My honest, non-sponsored review of the Vitruvian Trainer+

it’s probably the worst thing I’ve ever bought

After my long-running frustrations with the Tempo, I knew I wanted to try something else. Being a renter hesitant to put holes in my walls for a Tonal, the best option looked like the Vitruvian Trainer+, a sleek resistance-based training platform with a companion app containing classes, programs, and all the other stuff you’d expect with a smart fitness machine. Reviews of it were generally positive and called it the highest-quality device in its class. At $3,600, it better be! Unfortunately, the machine was a massive letdown. The entire experience was painful and not worth anywhere near $3,600 + $40/month forever.

Starting on the wrong foot

What pushed me over the edge to try the Vitruvian after being aware of it for ~two years was seeing an offer for 0% financing with Affirm. $4,500 is an easier charge to tolerate over time rather than all at once. I clicked the Affirm button and was rewarded with offers at (I forgot the exact number) something many points higher than 0% APR. I asked support about this, and they reminded me that there were tiny weasel words on the ads that said “as low as”, and the APR was up to Affirm. My credit score is over 800 at all three bureaus, so I’m not sure how much higher my score needs to be to qualify for 0% APR, but if it’s so high nobody can get it, that feels like a bait-and-switch.

There was another problem. Vitruvian, in big bold orange font on their website and Instagram ads, advertises a 30-day money-back guarantee.

Surely, there are some more details about how this works? On the last section of the FAQ, you can find the single return policy item:

Nothing too onerous, right? You have to keep the packaging, do the onboarding call, and not damage it – pretty standard stuff. I take issue with “as new” meaning “after you used it” becuase…it’s a 30 day trial. If you use it, it’s not “new” is it? But that’s a nitpick, I realize. Just for fun, what’s in the actual terms of service?

Two mentions of returns, both pretty standard legal boilerplate:

I forgot where I found this (I think Reddit?) but you are responsible for paying return shipping when you return the product. Vitruvian certainly doesn’t make this clear to the buyer for some reason! I paid about $170 for UPS to return the 100-lb unit and 40-lb Pro Kit.

It would cost nothing to add a sentence on the main page saying the buyer is responsible for return shipping. I don’t even think it’s unfair to ask the customer to pay to return something this heavy, but I think it’s a scummy move to try to hide it. Fitness companies love screwing their customers with hidden fees and legalese as much as car dealerships and this plus the Affirm issue didn’t give me confidence I was dealing with the most honest company.

Despite all of this, I was desperate for something to work, so I pulled the trigger. I should have listed to my gut.

The Hardware

Every Vitruvian Trainer+ review mentions how good the hardware is, and they’re right to do so – it’s mostly great. Almost everything looks and feels solid and high-quality (the side panels are pretty loose). If you aren’t going to get the subscription and just want the best portable digital weight machine on earth, you will probably be happy (this is the consensus from the subreddit – don’t bother with the software at all, and you’re fine).

I do have two complaints: the bench holds the bar attachment, which has loose cables with heavy locks on the end. There’s no way to secure the ends of the cables, so the heavy locks flail around wildly when you move the bench around (the image shows putting the cables in the clip with it, but I was worried to do that for reasons I’ll get to).

The bench was also changed at one point (the previous model had uneven legs, the new one has equally-sized legs and one of them folds up) but the Vitruvian 101 class and all of the in-app videos and guides weren’t updated. This seems like a small thing until you’re staring at the screen trying to figure out why you can’t get into any kind of position where the hip thrust will work and you can’t see the model on the screen.

The foot straps also never felt good to me and are a massive pain to adjust – the cable attachment sits at the side of my foot, at a different angle on both feet, and feels uncomfortable to actually put weight on.

The Software

Unfortunately, like Tempo, the solid hardware is let down by the software. Unlike the Tempo, the Vitruvian being controlled by the software makes workouts worse – not just the workout tracking.

I did a lot of research on Reddit and YouTube trying to figure out if the software was great before buying. Software makes or breaks these devices, as I learned the hard way with the Tempo. Users on Reddit had very mixed things to say about the software, but all the complaints were pretty different – I don’t recall seeing one main sticking point (in retrospect, I should have looked harder and spent more time on this).

I wasn’t happy with the lack of heart rate data, but figured I could do that on my own with the Apple Watch. I downloaded the app to get a preview of the classes and the general “feel” and everything seemed fine – it looked nice, and everything worked well that I could access. It passed the digital sniff test.

The Trainer+ arrived quickly, and once I got the machine out of the package setup was a snap. You just plug it in, open the app, scan a QR code, and you’re in. I was very impressed with the speed of the unboxing process and setup being so fast.

The list of nice things I have to say is short and we’re rapidly reached the end of it.

I started a workout.

How it’s supposed to work

Here’s how a workout is supposed to go, as far as I can tell:

1. Flip power on, or wake from standby with app. I use my 2019 iPad Pro.
2. Select workout in app. You can choose from a video class, a set program, or make your own.
3. The workout screen appears. You can not set the weight or reps in a pre-made workout. You can change them only if you made the workout yourself.
4. The machine makes you do three unweighted reps to understand how far the cable is pulled, so it can count your reps and time under tension (TOT) correctly.
5. The machine then adds the weight
6. The reps are counted as you work out. Some workout types/modes will add or remove weight based on how quickly you complete a rep, which is very cool
7. At the bottom of the last rep, the weight is de-loaded
8. Repeat 3-6 with every set of your workout; become swole and stroll along the beaches of Australia wearing only your budgie smuggler swimsuit and six-pack abs

How it actually went

I select the recommended starter program in the app, Vitruvian 101. The chipper Aussie trainer runs through a basic tutorial of the device. He delivers a spiel about how much you’re going to love the Trainer+ and how great it is and how everyone who has ever laid eyes on one fell it love it with it instantly and now goes for long runs on the beach in their happy, perfect, beautiful life.

Hey, this class audio is kinda quiet? It’s ok. I’ll think about that later.

The trainer reminds me of the practice rep system: you will always do three practice reps to confirm your ROM so the machine can do a good job spotting you and adjusting your weight.

Most movements, like a chest press or squat, require that you be in a position where you are holding the weight in the air. As soon as you pull the cables, the machine registers this as a practice rep.

First huge problem: You have to try to get in position very, very carefully to avoid the machine ruining the calibration and making you restart the set. I was able to trigger three front squat calibration reps in a few seconds just by wiggling the bar into position – meaning moving it less than an inch – on my shoulders.

Minor problem one: Complicating things, all the videos that use a different bench aren’t clear how the bench works. The Trainer is also asymmetrical, the cables are closer to the “front” of the machine than the back and it’s hard to see where you’re supposed to be. When I asked about the bench, they referred me to the manual, but I tried the manual’s way and the opposite way to place the bench on the machine and neither worked for the hip thrust. support told me they’d update the videos eventually, but I never got clarity on why my hip thrusts were at a 30 degree angle, pulling the bar toward my head and neck, when they would normally be flat.

After getting through calibration, you start actually pulling weight. Huge problem two: The machine’s safety features will never give you more weight than what you manually set in a program you created. There is an entire “Strength Calibration” program I slogged through to teach the machine how much I could lift, and as far as I can tell, the machine does not use this information at all. This is completely baffling. I thought I had done something wrong or clicked the wrong button at first, but on my call with a trainer, they confirmed this is expected behavior. Reddit also had multiple people confirm the strength calibration class is useless.

What? I’m more confused by this than any other issue I ran into, I can’t understand how this happened. Tempo’s weight recommendations were frequently wrong but they existed, at least!

At one point later on, I get fed up with lifting nothing. I quit the workout I was in, go into the movements screen, pick the movement I was doing, made my best guess at the weight, lift it for eight reps to inform the machine I am not the guy from SpongeBob with glass bones and paper skin, get back into the workout, get in position with the ginger care of a bomb defusal technician on their first day, and I finally start lifting real weight on some Arnold curls. It was a rough start, but it’s fine to have some bumps at first. Smooth sailing from here on out, surely.

Something is still amiss. I pause and look at my iPad more closely. Is it counting the reps I’m doing for these chest presses? Oh, it is counting my reps, but there’s no sound? The sound icon in the app looks on. Is my volume on? Yup, on all the way, hmm. Ah, the sound menu reminds me I have to turn silent mode off to get rep notifications. Don’t love that, but ok, I’ll turn it on so EAR-SPLITTING DING FROM MAX VOLUME iOS NOTIFICATION.

Okay, that’s not good, but let’s not give up now. Time to get back *DING* in position *DING* on the *DING* floor. Okay, one rep is now bloop done. Wait, that’s it? Rep two bloop. Rep three bloop. I would make that bloop 8-pt font if WordPress would easily let me. So to summarize: Huge problem three: The class audio is *DING* too quiet, non-class audio like *DING* rep counting *DING* requires *DING* you max out the volume *DING* on your *DING* device *DING* while *DING* silent *DING* mode *DING* is *DING* off. Support has no idea why this is, but they *DING* assure me they’re on it.

The bugs don’t stop there! Major Problem Four: after each movement, there is usually but not always a long delay (~30 seconds), before you see the “Well done!” screen that has a rest timer and shows you the stats from your sets of that movement. I thought this was a known thing when I first used the machine and just a UX goof, but the trainer I spoke to said this is a bug. Support has no idea why this is happening but again assured me they’re on the case. This seems like a minor thing but it can add 30 seconds or a minute delay between sets, and with how the classes are structured, a short class might have 20+ sets. It got annoying fast.

Okay, back to the workout. Now that the chest press is done, I think I know all the *DING* quirks of the software! Not a great start, but whatever. Time to try out the rope attachment. Okay, we’re doing face pulls with only 8lbs because I didn’t do this manually yet but that’s OK, easy as pie, five, six, seven-WHACK, I hit myself in the chin with the metal connector bit of the rope attachment.

Remember how I said the calibration was very sensitive? Well, I thought I did 3 calibration + 1 real rep. I actually did 3 calibration + 2 real reps; I was counting wrong in my head and didn’t have my eyes glued to the tiny rep counter on the 11″ iPad six feet from me I still can’t *DING* hear properly. Here’s my problem:

1. The app knew I was pulling the rope with 8lbs of force.
2. The app knew I was pulling the rope toward my face. The *DING* video shows the example trainer doing this, and the movement is literally called a Face Pull.
3. I could see, on the next, much more careful set, that the app was correctly registering where the rope was in relation to the ground via the orange “range” bar on the side of the screen.
4. Put simply: The app knew everything it needed to know, and it was still out for my blood.

Giant Problem Five: In a video class or timed set, the machine will deload when a timer is up, not when you actually put the weight down. What made me feel better is that my trainer in the intro call said he did the same thing when he first started and confirmed you need to keep a close eye on your iPad when working out to track weight changes. This seems like a massive safety issue but overstating the safety story seems to be the norm with “smart” at-home fitness equipment.

Thankfully that’s every major problem. Less thankfully, there are still more minor issues I ran into almost immediately, but not in the first three sessions:

Minor problem two: The machine can be very buggy when it wakes from standby. Support told me to turn it off after every session and not use standby mode.

Minor problem three: Sometimes, the machine would connect but the in-app “tracking bars” wouldn’t load and I couldn’t start the workout, one of the tracking bars wouldn’t move at all in line with the cable. The solution was always that old classic, turning it off and on again. Multiple times a workout. Yes, this kept happening after I stopped using standby mode.

Try, try, try, try, try, try, try again – if you dare

What really kills me is that there is a lot the Vitruvian app/trainer does right! I kept trying to like it! I wanted to like it! Also: returning huge, heavy stuff sucks! But after a few weeks, with the return deadline looming and bugs piling up in the in-app support system (which itself is buggy! I was never able to attach screen recordings I took showing issues and the built-in recorder didn’t work right).

I ultimately didn’t want to spend $3,600 chaining myself to this disaster.

What I liked

Before I really start getting critical, here’s the other stuff I did like:

• I love that you can export workouts as a CSV and clone classes to your own workout library to edit as you please.
• It’s easy to favorite, filter, and find anything you need.
• PRs are tracked and get a nice little icon in the workout history list.
• You can pick a workout from the list and just do it without going through a class/program/etc set-up flow
• I noticed that some very common movements had a bonus “How To” tab with a short video going into detail on how to properly do the movement, which I loved and instantly wished was on every movement in the library.
• The movement library is broad and the example GIFs (not the full videos only the handful of movements have) are high-quality.
• Cancelling the monthly subscription is actually pretty easy*
• Support responds quickly and actually reads the stuff you write. This is not sarcasm, it is a genuine plus
• I’m genuinely glad this exists and that someone is at least trying to make this kind of product work, even if my experience with it made me want to wheel it off my balcony.
• I forgot about the wheels – they were a nice touch!

Let’s get back to all the stuff that sucked

More? More.

• Why is there a strength assessment if that information isn’t used anywhere? I know this one is a duplicate but I’m still thinking about this. Why can’t I just turn the weight up in a class? Why is the process of adding more weight so byzantine? Don’t they want me paying the $40/mo for class access? Is this some legal requirement? Why is going up in weight during a class on a machine designed to keep you spending $40/mo on strength training classes a convoluted multi-step process? If me, the trainer, and the entire subreddit are having an issue with this we’re either all stupid or something went horribly wrong and nobody at Vitruvian HQ has noticed yet.
• It’s usually hard to see exactly what the coach is doing in a video class, there’s only one angle of anything and the video is taken from pretty far away. I’m trying to see exactly how far a trainer has the bar from their hips, or where their feet are placed, and I need to get my face an inch away from my iPad and scrutinize the video like it’s the Zapruder film. Tempo used multiple camera angles and cropped closer to the action which made it much easier to follow.
• If you stop paying the $40/mo subscription fee, you can’t even access your workout history or alternative lifting modes. This is insane, I knew this before buying and planned to keep the subscription if I loved it because I like video classes and I’m really lazy, but! Keeping workout history and modes hostage is ridiculously hostile to people that shelled out – I cannot emphasize this enough – thirty-six hundred dollars.
• Wearing, adjusting, and connecting the ankle straps is just awful. I have never had issues with ankle straps at gyms. These feel awkward to wear and are a pain to adjust.
• The programs include warm up recommendations, which is great. It’s just some text stapled to the top of the workout, which is less great. Reading the subreddit, I’m stupid, so this is likely more of a me problem, but I just can’t stuff like “pretending you have a tray of drinks on your back, turn your quadriceps starboard while moving your elbow into non-Euclidean space, and move your ribs outward while your chakras align inward”. I need a video, folks!
• Some of the movements in the classes are wild, and the difficulty curve in general is wacky. I got prompted to so a “Bulgarian Split Squat SC” (see screenshot above) and when I read the title, I thought good, I’ve done Bulgarian split squats before. Nope, not like this! The video showed the trainer balancing on the (wrong model) bench. I’m too stupid and uncoordinated for that kind of thing, but not so much so that I need a multi-week warm up to prepare me to deadlift 8lbs.
• I think the LED bar is supposed to be functional but unless you start at the ground the entire time, how would you see it? Do people do that? Do I not have enough mirrors or something? I’m confused at why the LED strip included in the device other than “it looks cool” reasons (to be fair: it does, and you can customize it). It flashes red if you stop working out before it thinks you’re ready to be done, but I don’t need a flashing light telling me I stopped lifting (or, more often, that I had to stop to mess around with the app and try to fix something)
• To the extent any of this is stuff I think other people will care about, this one I know is more of a me-specific complaint: I really, really hate when sellers keep hitting you with the sales pitch after you bought whatever they’re selling. I bought it! You sold it to me! Stop selling me! It’s not helping the used car dealership and/or cult vibe!
• It might be because I didn’t spend a ton of time with them, or that Vitruvian is target athletes a lot more than I thought, but the trainers are all business. Usually fitness coaches for consumers have a blend of encouragement/anecdotes/rare, bizarre comment that gives you an interesting insight into the inner working of their mind but not here, and I missed that more than I thought I would.
• The box came severely beat up, and there’s no instructions for putting everything back in the box to ship. Hopefully I did it right but I took photos of packing everything in case this turns into A Whole Situation™️ between me, Vitruvian, UPS, and the shipping insurer. (Update: it was fine)

Not having shipping insurance with the same company is annoying but it saves you a ton of money and Pirate Ship is easier to use than carrier websites anyway…matey.

So close, and yet so far – for me

A theory formed after getting responses on Reddit that almost unanimously circled around “none of us use the subscription, have you ever worked out before? Because you seem a bit dense”. Unfortunately I have worked out, a lot, with very expensive trainers. They work great, and are like setting a fistful of $20s on fire every time you see them.

At any rate, I also remembered this is the only at-home connected fitness company (we need an acronym for this, I have RSI) with a bulk purchase option on their site. Given all of that info: this product just might not be for casuals, at all. Every fitness company shows you real athletes on their website using the product, but nobody buying a Peloton or a Tempo expects to look like that, but maybe Vitruvian is trying to hit the pro and prosumer market and not us regular schlubs?

If you are a hardcore Fitness Person who loves to spend hours a week in your strength gym, scoffs at the very idea of not having every workout memorized, and flies to strongman competitions all the time or whatever, $3,600 for a buggy portable strength machine with 420lb of resistance…suddenly makes sense. If I only used Old School mode and tracked everything on my own I wouldn’t have noticed many of the bugs.

Wrapping up this 4,400 word post

There is a lot to love about the Vitruvian Trainer+ but ultimately it’s too much money for a too-buggy product. For me, I want connected fitness equipment – an all-in-one system. This is not that. It’s not even close, even if they fixed all the software bugs. I didn’t want to bet $3,600 on software fixes and feature improvements coming eventually at $40 a month, so back it goes.

If you’re considering buying a Vitruvian Trainer+ I hope this helped. Drop a comment, email me, or reach out in LinkedIn/Twitter if you have questions.

Update: Vitruvian did give me all my money back, and pushed out an app update the day I had it boxed up that allegedly fixed the “low class volume” issue.